MucheDumbre

Stardate 2010 point 04 point 18.  Assuming the command lounger of the USS Livingroom, I prepared for subspace comms from the usual Sunday morning suspects.  On the view screen, was Chris Matthews, on the syndicated and poor stepsister of Hardball, The Chris Matthews Show.  I know, it sounds like it should be some variety hour from the 1970’s.  However, anyone tuning in expecting a little song and dance would not be disappointed.

 Klein gets seditious

 Says Joe Klein, “I did a little bit of research just before this show – it’s on this little napkin here. I looked up the definition of sedition which is conduct or language inciting rebellion against the authority of the state. And a lot of these statements, especially the ones coming from people like Glenn Beck and to a certain extent Sarah Palin, rub right up close to being seditious.”

I nearly spit out my morning coffee. Liberals making accusations of sedition?  What is this, the 1800’s?  And that’s when it finally hit me.  The beard should have been a dead give away:  Joe Klein was from the Mirror Universe!

 The Mirror Universe is a concept originating from the original Star Trek episode, Mirror, Mirror.  In the episode, a transporter accident sends the gang into a parallel universe filled with evil twin counterparts of the regular Enterprise crew.  Instead of the USS Enterprise serving as the flagship of a peaceful Federation, wanting nothing more than exploration, kumbaya singing, and handholding, the ISS Enterprise is a warship of the Terran Empire, bent on conquest and exploitation of peaceful native peoples.  You know; evil like the humans in Avatar.

 The most popular of the Mirror Universe characters was clearly the evil Spock, who could use Vulcan logic to argue his support of the Terran Empire in the same way “good” Spock could use Vulcan logic to argue in favor of the Federation.

 In my opinion they were both out of their Vulcan minds.

 Get it?                    Ahem, with apologies to Ron & Ron.

 So sitting there in the command lounger, I realized that not only was Joe Klein from the Mirror Universe, but that there must have been other liberals replaced by their Mirror Universe counterparts for a while now, maybe years.  As I thought back, some of the clues that I had seen slowly started coming together…

 One of the early Obama Administration appointments to chair the National Intelligence Council was Charles “Chas” Freeman.  Freeman was unique in that he was not only an anti-Israel supporter of Saudi Arabia, but actually supported China’s Tiananmen Square crackdown of democracy supporters.  Liberals from this universe would be expected to be appalled by such a choice right?

 Nope.  They quickly suckled up to Freeman’s anti-Semitic, pro-Tiananmen crackdown.

 As astounding as that was, that was only one example where liberals took mirror universe positions.   The Citizen’s United case saw liberals turn snarling against the first amendment, even to the extent of wanting to repeal and replace the 1^st Amendment to the Constitution. 

 Remember how evil rendition was during the Bush administration?  No more!  Angry leftists (that should really be one word) should have been a bit disappointed.  This is not an issue that President Obama just has not gotten around to, considering how busy he has been restoring hope to the world; Obama signed an executive order authorizing the CIA to continue to “carry out what are known as renditions, secret abductions and transfers of prisoners to countries that cooperate with the United States.”  Leon Panetta, as CIA director nominee said renditions would continue under a Obama administration.

 So to paraphrase Gordon Gekko, Rendition, for lack of a better word, is good.

 The biggest turnabout though was on the Patriot Act.  This was renewed in February with barely a whisper.  This would have caused street protests and been the leading topic on the nightly news just a few short years ago.  Now, it gets you only a shrug. 

 So clearly I was right.  The only logical explanation for this strange turnaround on liberal opinion is that liberals themselves are being replaced with their Mirror Universe counterparts.  Is this prelude to an invasion?  Or are they refugees driven out by a third Bush term in the other universe?  I don’t know yet, but clearly I’m on to something.  Obviously these counterparts are not conservatives in their universe, not by any standards we would recognize, but they are certainly not the liberals I’ve known and made fun of for years.  Joe Klein, a man who participated in anti-war street protests, is now ready to drop the sedition hammer on sign waving grandmas, and have Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck hauled off to the gulag.

 I can only hope that maybe a Mirror Universe Cartman will drop through to our universe to clear things up.  Maybe a goateed Maureen Dowd, or Paul Krugman – wait, he already has a beard, drats!  Another one!  Until we can get to the bottom of this invasion, trust no liberals!  It’s always been good advice but it’s never been more important.  We don’t know what plans they hold for our world, but if they are anything like our world’s liberals, it’s nothing good.

 Keep watching the skies!