The Harbinger

So, after a muche needed break from doing this, we’re back. I haven’t been taking my happy juice (scotch) so you’re properly fucked. Just thought you should know before the tree trunk magically materializes in your rectum and you have to question why.

I’ll do it, fine. Keep your accusatory ocular oscillations off of my transitional passages meant to entice you to read further. The answer to the question everyone has been asking, the reason the site is getting so many hits and the all pervasive sometimes invasive query that no speculation can quite quell within reasonable boundaries for all involved.
No, we’re not going to Dragon*Con this year. Sorry.

Oh, also there’s that question you really have to search for with Transmission Electron Microscope to find any talk of, what happened to Blackbean?

Far be it for me to inject some facts and admittedly repressed (not so much) bitterness into things, but it fails my ability to relate to ‘humans’ when they are presented with a few unassailable insights into the industry they are discussing and the end result is utter obfuscation and complete denial.

“I heard that Encyclopedic Topography is a new study involving the mapping of the most looked into topics.”

“It was invented by the Aliens.”

“No, it was not. It’s akin to the study that brought about google.com.”

“So these aliens, they said once on a program notorious for lying that…”

That’s pretty much it. Look, if they aren’t talking, it’s for a reason and 9 times out of 10 that reason is legal in nature due to someone worried about what might be said in retaliation or in court. Or, more to the point, when you’re fired.

But fine, you need your speculation? Here’s one that is TOTALLY fictional. Russo told Black Beard that Drool said something about his girlfriend. It was a true statement, but it wasn’t Black Beard’s girl talked about, it was Russo’s. Desperately wanting some semblance of control over the direction their ship was taking, Russo knew he had to keelhaul someone and BB looked easiest. Break the chain, break the habit. Black Beard attacked Drool on stage at a rival company event, sure to get him fired for assaulting a high profile member of a rival crew under the assumed sanctity of the event. Unfortunately, the company they work for, Obscure Passage, did not do what was predicted and fire BB. So, in an embarrassed show of solidarity for the other members of the crew, Russo had to pay for a lot of legal counsel to make things appear right. It took a long time, but finally a loop hole was found to excise Black Beard from the ship and Russo sails off into the night happy at long last.

That’s really about as feasible as anything else. Sheesh. Just let it go or wait for the substantiation that I am right.

Anyone ever wonder why the other forms of media hate radio people? All over the place you see TV people, Printed Media people et al attacking radio people by the virtue of their one weapon available…not giving radio people credit for anything. Seriously, they flub the station name, reverse the talent’s name or ignore them completely when the radio person’s event has their name stamped all over it. Why?

Jealousy. Seriously! In any given metro, conduct a poll taking the names of the top radio personalities in that market and match them up with the same from TV News and the Paper. Bet you people have heard of the radio people more than the others. Take it to a national stage. See what happens. Stern and Imus, Opie and Anthony…you’re going to lose. Radio people garner more attention and notoriety from the common folk than their TV or print counterparts, by doing far LESS work for it. Sucks, but there it is.

I ruled AFO. I did the Dead Milkmen’s “Punk Rock Girl” at Karaoke Thursday night and instead of driving people away, which was my intent, people came over to check it out. Beats some girl taking a crap song like “Stacy’s Mom” and giving it anime centric lyrics written down and STILL messing it all up.

My Villain panel was beyond your usual panel about almost anything. That was pure force of sobriety’s angered will. The closing ceremonies saw me getting a standing ovation as the evil Prince despite my claims to shut down the dance on Saturday. Actually, outside of the dance room itself, every time I mentioned that the dance would be shut down by my overt machinations, I was applauded. Weird.

I certainly was no deuteragonist that weekend. Not like the next fellow tried to paint things for us…

I can take criticism, but when I know that the reason for it is someone’s overactive sense of self-hate and loathing coupled with an ability to get offended by ANYTHING seeping into their assessment of what people are actually saying, then I discount it for what it really is. All it is, is deception and lies in the form of being offended for the sake of being offended because no one is paying attention to you. Some self-professed “I’m kinda a big deal” guy wandered into the chat room last night during the show (put it together, genius…I’m cheating) and no one really cared. Then he heard me say something about Christian Slater having a cock in his mouth being the reason he was even in the cinematic abortion known as Alone in the Dark and suddenly I am gay bashing. But…we saved the chat transcripts, you douche! I’ll just include his part for the most…

[20:34] {UnimportantDouche} Sorry if I’m quiet .. .listening while I
sniff some EverCrack
[20:34] {AnaAesthetic} Tomb of Jesus?
[20:37] {Iceman2469} dude this music is killer.
[20:37] {Gary} Nice. Gonna go google that now.
[20:38] {UnimportantDouche} Yes, it’s literally killing me

Of course, first strike is this guy has no idea that he’s not actually being killed by anything other than his love for swallowing his own bullshit.

[20:38] {AnaAesthetic} hahaha
[20:38] {AnaAesthetic} It’s Wumpscut - Hide and Seek
[20:39] {Gary} Mongo’s favorite part.
[20:39] {Iceman2469} Just Push Play, now with 23% more scotch
[20:40] {UnimportantDouche} LOL!
[20:40] {UnimportantDouche} This Scotch thing is hilarious
[20:40] {AnaAesthetic} We need more scotch! *whips the boys with a
fish*
[20:40] {Gary} Thanks! The Scotch Counsel hired us to remake their
image.
[20:41] {UnimportantDouche} lol
[20:43] {Iceman2469} The shuttle has a gash now? Who knew ?
[20:44] {UnimportantDouche} They brought a shuttle home once without
wings and a windshielf
[20:44] {UnimportantDouche} windshield
[20:44] {AnaAesthetic} Listen, we only broadcast once a week, fresh
news ain’t all that great
[20:44] {AnaAesthetic} no way!
[20:44] {Iceman2469} i heard they had to stop once in the atmosphere
and jumpstart the shuttle
[20:44] {UnimportantDouche} And they once brought a shuttle home without a
shuttle
[20:44] {UnimportantDouche} That was a bit awkward
[20:45] {AnaAesthetic} Genius!
[20:45] {AnaAesthetic} How did they manage
[20:45] {UnimportantDouche} One time an astronaut did a spacewalk, and
tripped
[20:45] {UnimportantDouche} I mean, how clumsy do you have to be?
[20:45] {Iceman2469} Les Stroud could soar thru the atmosphere
without a shuttle
[20:46] {geoff} x33
[20:46] {UnimportantDouche} I like to do the Moonwalk while drinking
Jesus Juice and having some alien singing Thriller molest me

Anyone else feel like this guy needs someone to constantly provide him some sort of validation for his “look at me I’m weird” attitude? Sorry, dude, no one here knows who you are except Ana and that’s only because you used to be a groupie on her old show. No one in this chat room is going to reward weird for weird’s sake when it’s just not funny. So, he hears something he doesn’t like and suddenly…

[20:49] {UnimportantDouche} Wow … this is pretty anti-gay
[20:49] {Gary} I hope they don’t remake Enter the Dragon…
[20:50] {Iceman2469} Ben Affleck as THOR!!
[20:50] {AnaAesthetic} Yeah, men and in fear of their sexuality… go
figure
[20:50] {Iceman2469} Steven Seguall will star in the new Hulk 2 movie.
[20:50] *** UnimportantDouche
(~muchedumb@wikkedwire-4F3D0FF2.tampfl.fios.verizon.net) has quit IRC
[A bientôt]
[20:53] {UnimportantDouche} When does the entertainment actually start on
this show?

I don’t know, how quickly can you lop your own head off?

[20:54] {UnimportantDouche} Where is the great sounding lady? And why are
they talking and she isn’t?

I won’t touch the horrible grammar even if it’s from someone whose finished words actually reach the printing press since it’s chat, but this guy automatically starts reaching. Something you should know, but it’s not important at all, is that we were informed that he is gay and Jewish. Watch him flail in vain.

[20:54] {UnimportantDouche} lol
[20:55] {UnimportantDouche} zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
[20:56] {UnimportantDouche} soooooo bored

Yet here you are, on a Friday night no less, listening and interacting with something you claim is boring you. If your agenda was any less obvious your screen name would be “EASILY OFFENDED BY MYSELF.” As such, it’s just your name, which implies all of the above anyway.

[20:56] {UnimportantDouche} I feel like I’m listening to C-SPAN

And typing as fast as his pudgy little digits can muster the strength to do apparently.

[20:56] {Iceman2469} For the Order of death they need to check the
seating chart like in Final Destination.
[20:56] {UnimportantDouche} I love watching the paint dry on these walls
…

No offense, but you also love to gargle semen so your proclivities toward what you like matter little in the grand scheme. Geez, who put the icy hot in your anal-eze? That’s more a knock that we DIDN’T TELL ANY GAY JOKES DURING THE SHOW than an outright gay joke here. Just giving him what he wanted post chat.

[20:57] {Iceman2469} walk up to a mic and yell “MR. GORBACHOF, TEAR
DOWN THIS WALL”
[20:57] {UnimportantDouche} Mr. Gorbachev! Take this show off the air!

He’s so witty! So bright and funny! And he tells himself this in the mirror every day!

[20:57] {Iceman2469} Brian Adams Cause of death……. Death.
[20:58] {UnimportantDouche} No. 1 cause of suicide: Listening to this show

If that were true your incisors would have chewed through your pulpy wrists and we’d be happy, since like a mythical deity you need worship to exist, you mentally inept and jovially short cut taking extraordinaire of the absolute value of suck. It’s a shame you didn’t end yourself, the world ended its recognition of your meaningful impact to existence long ago.

[20:58] {Iceman2469} Dude Gary, the worse show premire last week was
Flash Gordon. God i was superly disappointed.
[20:58] {UnimportantDouche} Flash Gordon could win an Emmy compared to
this show

The show he can’t tear himself away from. I would win a Pulitzer Prize from trashing his work, which by the way is probably going to be the easiest endeavor I’ve ever engaged in.

[20:58] {UnimportantDouche} Hell, a Peabody
[20:58] {Gary} You can leave anytime.
[20:59] {UnimportantDouche} Why? It’s much more fun entertaining myself
here. Someone has to do it

I tried. I noticed he wasn’t happy nor was he ever going to give a straight answer (NOT A GAY JOKE) so there was his opt out. I was more concerned that everyone else would tear him a new one in a way he wouldn’t enjoy. Or, seeing that he’s an attention addict, he’d probably like anything people threw at him. Either way, I was busy doing a show.

[20:59] {geoff} you jack off to the show?
[20:59] {geoff} weird
[20:59] {Iceman2469} first off for FG, Ming looks like a douche.
[20:59] {geoff} I mean, do what you do, but, weird
[20:59] {UnimportantDouche} The second episode, Ming is actually better
[20:59] {UnimportantDouche} Nah … I jack off to porn.

Thank GOD he didn’t elaborate. Usually at this point self-loathers with a “weird out” complex describe in detail what they jerk off to in an attempt to garner more attention. Luckily, I think he was preoccupied. Eww. Maybe he thinks the show is porn?

[21:00] {Iceman2469} Shirley you can’t be serious?
[21:01] {geoff} spaceballs suffer from the curse of mel
[21:01] {UnimportantDouche} I wish this show would go on an airplane …
one way

One non-stop flight into your cerebrum boarding now, never to leave there chief dip-shit.

[21:01] {geoff} “I CANNOT let ten minutes pass without a jew joke”
[21:01] {UnimportantDouche} Might as well .. already done gay jokes,
let’s insult everyone … which you already are by simply calling this
“entertainment”
[21:01] {UnimportantDouche} That’s an insult in of itself

Again, this guy supposedly writes for a living. We never told one gay joke. Here, go find one here.

Howey, anyone…I’m serious here. Was there something I’m missing? The Slater joke was an allusion to him being more concerned with work than with the quality of work and that he was so hard up for money he’d do anything. I thought it was obvious. Hell, the gay joke was in the scotch commercial and was an intentional misdirection, that he laughed at.

[21:01] {eh} doh
[21:01] {geoff} oh!
[21:01] [MLG] uhhh
[21:02] [MLG] can you chill with that a bit please?
[21:02] {UnimportantDouche} Why? You would rather us all say, “You are
awesome!”
[21:02] {UnimportantDouche} Sorry, I don’t know how to lie
[21:02] [MLG] i don’t care what you think of the show
[21:02] {eh} nice
[21:02] {UnimportantDouche} Obviously
[21:02] [MLG] i just don’t need you to repeat it over and over
[21:02] {Gary} He’s just bitting.
[21:02] {eh} ml of g…
[21:03] {UnimportantDouche} if you just want to talk to hear yourself
speak, sing in the shower. But if you want an audience, start to care
what they want.
[21:03] {Gary} What do you want?
[21:03] {Gary} Be specific.
[21:03] {Iceman2469} he hates scotch
[21:03] {geoff} he wants to jack off to ana’s voice
[21:03] {Gary} Sorry we offended you and your sensibilities.
[21:03] {Iceman2469} he likes whiskey
[21:03] {geoff} and dudes
[21:03] {AnaAesthetic}
[21:03] {UnimportantDouche} Interesting topics of discussion, some humor,
and not any of whatever you spent the last hour wasting my time with
[21:03] {Gary} That’s really constructive!
[21:04] {eh} hmmm
[21:04] {eh} so you’d rather hear ?
[21:04] {eh} topics about ?
[21:04] {geoff} What was wrong with the nasa topic, the bad video
game movie topic, and comic book news?
[21:04] {eh} where should the conversation flow ?

Now watch him grasp for whatever he can without being specific like asked.

[21:04] {UnimportantDouche} Well, I could’ve done without 20 minutes of
straight news that had no interesting commentary with it. Even Howard
doesn’t let Robin ramble

Awesome, he compared us to Howard! I’m using that in the press kit. Thanks, ass! Now give me the monetary compensation that’s compensatory for your egregious criticism…

[21:04] {geoff} right on
[21:05] {geoff} that’s constructive criticism
[21:05] {geoff} that’s good stuff
[21:05] {geoff} can you do me a favor and listen to all the shows on
the network

You have to respect Geoff’s work ethic here. He turned this dude around to a degree just by playing along and showing him some attention that his father wouldn’t, but his father’s friend may have.

[21:05] {UnimportantDouche} And grow some thick skin.
[21:05] {eh} so..ten maybe
[21:05] {geoff} and then email me at somacow@gmail.com
[21:05] {Gary} Thich skin?
[21:05] {Iceman2469} Well Howard is being paid $150million to say
fuck and have strippers in studio
[21:05] {UnimportantDouche} I mean sheesh .. if I whined at people being
a dick to me in e-mail, I would’ve left the Internet years ago.
[21:05] {geoff} then we can break it down, know wut Im sayin’?
[21:05] {Gary} Thick even.
[21:05] {eh} who whinned ?
[21:06] {Gary} When did I ever say you bothered me?
[21:06] {eh} ml of g doesn’t count
[21:06] {UnimportantDouche} Oh, MLG doesn’t count, then I take back the
thick skin comment. =P

Hell, let him confuse people all he wants. Plus, he’s the one who gets all kinds of bent out of shape from something he heard us say. Thick skin? The only reason he has no subcutaneous fat is because it bleeds through what passes for an epidermis on him. People were screaming for him to get kicked, but I needed fodder for my rant.:)- Smarter by far than this douche am I.

[21:06] {eh} k
[21:06] {eh} carry on then
[21:06] {eh} conersations
[21:06] *** UnimportantDouche
(~muchedumb@wikkedwire-4F3D0FF2.tampfl.fios.verizon.net) has quit IRC
[A bientôt]
[21:07] {eh} conversations…what are you interested in..?
[21:07] * Iceman2469 waves goodbye
[21:07] {eh} eh
[21:07] *** UnimportantDouche
(~muchedumb@wikkedwire-4F3D0FF2.tampfl.fios.verizon.net) has joined
#muchedumbre
[21:07] {Iceman2469} too bad
[21:07] {Gary} He should’ve called.
[21:07] {eh} welcome bach
[21:07] {UnimportantDouche} Who?
[21:07] {UnimportantDouche} Me?
[21:07] {eh} you
[21:07] {Gary} Yeah.
[21:07] {UnimportantDouche} Sorry, dude … I only call radio.

But you’ll spend your night listening to us, so we’re flattered! Plus, he knew that he’d get eviscerated on the air with us.

[21:07] {UnimportantDouche} I do Blank Radio once a month, and Blank once in a
While

And I’ll bet their pet name for you is something akin to a witty “Gay Jew Dork” but never to your face, whichever side of it you pretend to present at the moment you amorphous shaped blob of insecurities masquerading as accomplishments…

Let’s do some quick look at meisms now to end this.
[21:08] {eh} you in chicago
[21:08] {UnimportantDouche} Nope
[21:08] {UnimportantDouche} I’m in Florida.
[21:08] {eh} where’s
[21:08] {eh} and you call them
[21:08] {UnimportantDouche} They call me
[21:09] {UnimportantDouche} To talk to me.
[21:09] {UnimportantDouche} Science fiction, comic books
[21:10] {eh} you own a comic book store ?
[21:10] {UnimportantDouche} lol
[21:10] {UnimportantDouche} no
[21:10] {eh} you draw comics
[21:10] {UnimportantDouche} I wish … free comics!
[21:10] {UnimportantDouche} I used to do radio back in high school
[21:11] {UnimportantDouche} I am an entertainment news reporter
[21:11] {eh} in fla…hmmm
[21:11] {Gary} And an all around great guy!
[21:11] {UnimportantDouche} Yeah. w/e lol
[21:11] {UnimportantDouche} I say it like it is
[21:11] {Gary} Tell us more about you.
[21:11] {UnimportantDouche} Doing good, Geoff
[21:11] {UnimportantDouche}
[21:12] {UnimportantDouche} Florida doesn’t offer a lot … but that’s
what the Internet is for.
[21:12] {eh} so…he
[21:12] {eh} is here
[21:12] {UnimportantDouche} And I just put reporters in key markets.
[21:12] {eh} fishing for plugs
[21:12] {UnimportantDouche} Plugs?
[21:12] {UnimportantDouche} My site gets 10,000 unique visitors … every
day. I don’t need them, lol
[21:12] {eh} oh
[21:13] {UnimportantDouche} THAT joke was funny!
[21:13] {Iceman2469} So, Muchedumbre.com got that many hits in 1 day
for our Blackbean Threads
[21:13] {UnimportantDouche} Hits?
[21:13] {UnimportantDouche} I am talking about unique visitors, not hits
[21:13] {Iceman2469} unique Visitors? you mean Child pedophiles?
[21:13] {Mongo} 10k isn’t bad

[21:15] {geoff} right on. If you need any advice or help with podcast
tools, let me know
[21:15] {UnimportantDouche} Thanks, Geoff! I really appreciate it. I
don’t know shit about podcasting, lol

Obviously. You know nothing about radio either. It’s cool that you did high school radio, but that means about as much as completing high school math and trying to teach at a Doctorate level.

[21:15] {UnimportantDouche} This bit is funny.

Of course, I was involved. Funnier by far than you as well.

[21:15] {Iceman2469} Japan’s Naked news with sign language
interperters were fired for not signing but tweaking their nipples
[21:16] {UnimportantDouche} lol
[21:16] {UnimportantDouche} lol
[21:18] {UnimportantDouche} The rest of it is crap

While I agree that your contribution is crap, let’s continue with your hits.

This is it, all him except for set ups…

[21:19] {UnimportantDouche} We used to talk regularly with one of the
creators of that comic book
[21:20] {UnimportantDouche} The new Eureka sets are AWESOME!
[21:20] {UnimportantDouche} I can’t believe how big they are
[21:20] {UnimportantDouche} And I like the actos on that show .. I need
to watch it more
[21:21] {UnimportantDouche} They showed us the new Global Dynamics set,
and I was expecting what we had in the first season
[21:21] {UnimportantDouche} Yeah, the BSG set was real cool!
[21:21] {UnimportantDouche} Brannon Braga is tampering with Wikipedia
[21:22] {UnimportantDouche} I laid on Adama’s couch, lol
[21:22] {UnimportantDouche} And got yelled at, lol
[21:26] {UnimportantDouche} Yeah .. we visited every set in Vancouver,
except Bionic Woman, but we walked by their soundstage
[21:27] {UnimportantDouche} My Ming would be taller, muscular, and
shirtless
[21:28] {UnimportantDouche} While we were in Vancouver, we drove by a
location shoot of “Psych”
[21:28] {UnimportantDouche} The pilot was horrible
[21:28] {UnimportantDouche} Ana! NO DOCTOR WHO!
[21:31] {UnimportantDouche} I’ve never seen the show
[21:31] {UnimportantDouche} I lied to Stan Lee, lol!
[21:31] {UnimportantDouche} Am I going to hell?
[21:32] {UnimportantDouche} I told him I watch the show, lol
[21:34] {UnimportantDouche} Didn’t Comic-Con already happen?
[21:34] {geoff} Orlando Comic Con?
[21:34] {AnaAesthetic} Orlando Comic Con
[21:34] {UnimportantDouche} I didn’t go this year, so maybe my calendar is
off
[21:34] {UnimportantDouche} Oh .. is it related to the real Comic-Con?
[21:35] {UnimportantDouche} I almost went to DragonCon
[21:35] {UnimportantDouche} But I won’t
[21:35] {UnimportantDouche} Peter David, lol!
[21:35] {UnimportantDouche} He’s probably still pissed at me, lol
[21:35] {UnimportantDouche} But who isn’t
[21:36] {UnimportantDouche} At Necro a couple years back, everyone was in
my panels, and not his, lol!
[21:36] {UnimportantDouche} His writing is great, but in person, he’s an
angry old Jew
[21:36] {UnimportantDouche} I’m an angry young Jew, so we don’t get along
[21:36] {UnimportantDouche} I don’t know, I stopped going after last year
when they put some fraud on a panel with me
[21:37] {UnimportantDouche} He claimed he was a spec writer for television
[21:37] {Gary} I’d love to go as a G4 guy but I can’t afford the cut
in pay.
[21:37] {UnimportantDouche} LOL!
[21:38] {UnimportantDouche} I would never live anywhere near Orlando,
hahaha! =P
[21:38] {ShtUpLstnLearn} You have to go to the tasting room at the
brewery before you do your show here
[21:38] {Gary} Hey Jackie! Didja get my PM?
[21:38] {ShtUpLstnLearn} yes!
[21:38] {Gary} YES YES YES!!!
[21:38] {ShtUpLstnLearn} I have responded already
[21:39] {UnimportantDouche} YES OH GOD YES!
[21:39] {ShtUpLstnLearn} I will go with you
[21:39] {ShtUpLstnLearn} dood
[21:39] {ShtUpLstnLearn} we bought a CASE of beer
[21:39] {UnimportantDouche} Sorry … got caught up in the moment

People stopped paying attention, so he quietly left. Sorry to make you read all this, but there’s a reason! Do me a favor and take his words and craft a positive spin on the show for me. Just make sure he actually said it, but you can mix and match anywhere you wish. I’ll post it on our front page and even give him credit. Thanks!

People stopped paying attention, so he quietly left. Sorry to make you read all this, but there’s a reason! Do me a favor and take his words and craft a positive spin on the show for me. Just make sure he actually said it, but you can mix and match anywhere you wish. I’ll post it on our front page and even give him credit. Thanks!