The Harbinger

Fusion One South Orange Avenue, Orlando

I’ve walked by this bar/club downtown a few times and was always accosted by some scantily clad women in black and a dude (thankfully not scantily clad) telling me “free cover! come in fusion! best club in town!”-I’ve always walked by with my head turned refusing to even engage in eye contact as I’ve had other destinations in mind. Last night after seeing Jeff Howell at Casey’s (see previous blog) a group of us decided to make our own pub crawl and go to bars we have never been to or not in a long time. Just walk in as we pass. Well, the people at Fusion were so annoying we almost passed it up but decided in the spirit of things to try it out-”free cover and 2.00 drinks”. OK, free cover was true-and 2.0o drinks was a lie, it was 2.00 drink (no “s”) of Miller Lite or some crap. We walked in and the beer bitch up front (I shouldn’t call her that, she was probably very nice) said “cheapest drinks here!” and I looked at her funny-aren’t they the same in the whole place? it’s not that big…

So we go in and Groove is in the Heart is on which is always fun and we all smile a little. The bartender is also clad in black short school girl type skirt. She looked all 30 something short haired like a gothic I-bar person but she was shaking it to the music…She would shake her shaker about oh 100 times over her head in time with the music and sing and make funny faces. It was entertaining but since there were maybe 20 people in the bar, 2 bartenders, and us waiting on our drinks I just wanted her to hurry up! We had some hopping to do. So I got a beer and Geoff got a martini (I guess this was a martini type bar) and he said that -fu said it was stout which must be why he kept trying to light it on fire… I had his olives which were chewy and tasteless. The people next to us had 4 shots of something that came to 36.00! woo… So we had our drinks while some hip hop played and people danced. We came to realize this was either a lesbian bar or every 20 something female just enjoys grinding in a spoon like train fashion with each other. I think it was the latter.

We’re about to all finish our drinks when Hey Ya! comes on so we did a little dancing. Then the other girl and I see all the guys staring at the bar-I was afraid to turn around as the look seemed to be intrigue mixed with slight disgust. But my curious nature kicked in and I looked. Up on the bar was the shaking intense bartender. She had her back turned to everyone and was bouncing her butt up and down which made her short school girl skirt flap up to reveal nothing underneath! If she had a thong on then it was deeply imbedded between her cheeks.

I dropped my jaw and then turned back to my dancing. I checked out the bathroom which is upstairs, down a hall, turn right, down another hall and there it was. It was average. Clean enough but nothing spectacular. Just one hell of a walk! Oh, and at the end of our night, after a few more bar stops, we were walking back to our car and the guy was out there yelling “10 more minutes with no cover”…

Ratings: Service 3-get the drinks out first before shaking everything you can find.

Drinks 3-the ones who had mixed drinks/martinis said they were well made but overall pricy (8.50 for a martini that, unless made by the bouncy shaking girl, is not so well made). We had a small plastic cup of rum and coke and a beer which was 10.00…too much for the atmosphere of this place.

Atmosphere 3.5-not my cup of tea. It was a small bar/club. Some seats and high top tables but nothing spectacular.

Restrooms 3-adequate and no line but that may have been because of the lack of people or that you got lost trying to find it and gave up.

Overall 3

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